pokebox | LOCKED TO ardent

LOCKED TO ardent

[The apartment is on the third floor, with windows looking out to Goldenrod City. It isn't the biggest place, but it is far better than the base. The place is small - one bathroom, one bedroom, a kitchen, and a small sitting room that doubles as a dining room - but it hasn't taken long for them to settle in. Mondo had cleaned up the place earlier that day while Ishimaru was out with his "superior officer," Colonel Archer. Mondo still isn't fond of Archer or his friend Kimblee, but he knows better than to say anything around them. Ishimaru seems to like them at least, so they can't be that bad, right?

Well, that doesn't matter now anyway. Mondo had finished up what little work he had for the organization early and had returned home to make sure the house was tidy. He knows how Ishimaru likes things - perfect and organized, with the exception of the closet. He hasn't touched the closet at all; that's Ishimaru's space. But it's getting later in the evening and despite what Ishimaru thinks, Mondo can cook.]

Butch, c'mon. Get down from there. I just dusted!

[It doesn't particularly matter that they had only been in the apartment for a week, Mondo knows better than to leave dust lying around. Ishimaru is probably allergic to it. It seems like he's allergic to everything, including Butch, the Lillipup Mondo had hatched from an egg not too long ago. Butch reminds him a bit of Chuck, but that isn't something Mondo wants to focus on now. He scoops up the puppy and carries him into the living room, letting the dog curl up on the couch almost as soon as he's put down.]

Stay. Got it? Stay. Shit, it's been fucking years since I last tried training a dog.

[But he seems rather pleased anyway. Mondo returns to the kitchen where he sets about preparing dinner. He might have a stupidly adorable Pikachu and Pichu apron on. Just saying.]

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[Oh fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. He didn't mean to scare Ishimaru, and even though his friend (can he even call him his brother anymore?) is yelling back, Mondo's fully aware of how badly he's startled Ishimaru.

His initial reaction is to yell again, and he almost does it. A soft yipping distracts him momentarily and he glances behind the couch to see Butch cowering in fear. That's all it takes for Mondo's expression to soften, and he returns Butch to his Pokéball.

He doesn't want to scream at Ishimaru. He doesn't want to make him flinch like that or frustrate him. Mondo instead moves to take his dish to the kitchen, tossing it into the dishwasher. He returns and sits back down, hands on his knees and eyes turned away. He's not sure what to say, but he knows he has to start somewhere.]

...Look, I... This isn't something I can really talk about. Not yet. Give me some time to think it over and figure it out for myself and then I'll tell you, alright? Sorry for shouting at you.

[There's a sudden jolt of fear that courses through him as Mondo recalls Butch and then immediately leaves the room, though it dissipates quickly enough when he realizes that Mondo is simply doing something in the kitchen rather than storming out entirely; surely he wouldn't have bothered with the kitchen at all if he was just going to leave, right?

He manages to force himself to calm down well enough to at least sit back against the couch like a relatively normal person; his posture is still entirely too tight, but that isn't exactly anything new, as he goes. He looks over at Mondo again when he rejoins him on the couch, however, his expression curious; he isn't sure why Mondo seems unable to look at him, but he doesn't try to change that any, taking in his words in silence for a moment.

To say that Ishimaru understands what Mondo is talking about would be overstating it, but at the very least he seems able to accept the answer.]

It's okay - I'm not angry or anything, and I won't make you talk about it.

[...]

Can you...answer something for me, though...?

Yeah, of course. What is it?

[At least Ishimaru isn't pressing the point any. Mondo does look at his friend when that question's out there though, head tipped slightly to one side.]

Did I...well, did I do something to offend you, just now?

[It was something that he had intended to ask him in the first place, though as soon as the question was out there it occurred to him just how valid a concern it should probably be - what with Mondo's general fixation on strength and insisting that weakness as a concept was some sort of grave insult...well. It was possible that he had misinterpreted Ishimaru's actions, wasn't it? He's been told by some of the other Rockets that he tends to act overfamiliar toward others, and they seem surprised by his insistence that he isn't gay, when asked - he doesn't know what Mondo's actual thoughts on homosexuality are, but would it be all that surprising if he found that to be weak as well? Most their age seem to think it odd and emasculating - if Mondo thought he had been coming onto him, wouldn't that be insulting him in some way? Maybe that's why he can't discuss it with him just yet; Mondo really does seem to not want to hurt him, so it's possible that he's trying to find some way to let him down gently without fundamentally insulting him, if Mondo really thinks that he's gay...

...oh. Well. Um. That would...explain a lot wouldn't it please tell him that he hasn't offended you holy shit]

What?

[That genuinely hadn't occurred to him, and for a moment, Mondo just stares at Ishimaru, trying to process what he was just asked.]

Did you...? No. Fuck no.

[He comes down a little too hard on the last words and he's fully aware of it. Hopefully Ishimaru won't notice.]

That's not something you have to worry about, aniki. [Should he really be calling Ishimaru that?] And even if you did somehow offend me, I'd tell you about it. I wouldn't just... leave you to fucking wonder about it.

[He's hit with the strangest urge to reach out and take Ishimaru's hand. He crushes that urge immediately but can't shake the thought that comes with it. He really is interested in Ishimaru, isn't he?]

[He tenses as Mondo's tone hardens, coming down hard on those last two words; his fingers tighten against the fabric of his pants where his hands are resting on his thighs, and he looks away, focusing instead on some vague spot in front of him.

The rest of what Mondo is saying seems to provide at least some comfort, however, and he nods at the end of it, though he's still more than a bit tense.]

I...I'm glad, aniki, thank you.

[It takes all of Mondo's willpower not to flinch at that term. He manages to keep his expression under control, however, and after a moment, reaches out to squeeze Ishimaru's shoulder.]

Hey, don't worry so much, alright? You didn't do anything wrong.

[As nice as that touch to his shoulder is, that doesn't stop the look Ishimaru shoots him; he's always been very open with his facial expressions, and the "oh my god you can't be serious" couldn't be any louder if he'd actually said it.]

I don't understand, then. You didn't start acting strangely until I -

[He cuts himself off then; he doesn't want to keep fighting over this, they had just started to calm down some...!]

...ah, but it's all right! We can discuss it later, I don't mind!

[Mondo stiffens at that; Ishimaru knows, doesn't he? He'd have to be stupid not to know. But Ishimaru is quick to move on (probably wanting to avoid another fight) and Mondo is just as quick to agree with him.]

I promise I'll tell you about it when I've figured it all out for myself. It's... kind of a personal thing, that's all. Once I've got my answer, I'll tell you, okay?

[Perhaps he would have to be stupid not to know. However, that's not taking into account that when it comes to things like this? Ishimaru is, in fact, very stupid.]

Whenever you're ready, aniki; I don't mind waiting!

[Well, Ishimaru would be waiting a little while then. Perhaps a week wasn't really a long time to figure out one's feelings for their best friend-slash-brother, but Mondo had always been the sort to decide things quickly and stick to his decisions. The fact that this took him a week instead of maybe a couple of days at the most wasn't lost on him. Obviously he wanted to make sure this went right, or at least, as right as it could go.

His conclusion is probably the most obvious one in the world: he cares about Ishimaru as more than just a brother. That realization brought some relief with it; he's obviously not replacing Daiya and he's finally figured out why Ishimaru means so much to him despite knowing the hall monitor for such a short amount of time.

He's perfectly comfortable with the idea, but explaining this to Ishimaru is going to be a hassle. If he doesn't end up shrieking his love confession at Ishimaru, it'll be a miracle.

Today's another boring day of laundry duty and little else. If he didn't know better, he'd think that someone just didn't want him out fighting. But that's ridiculous; clearly the higher-ups just have something else in store for him. He finishes later than usual - mostly because he was daydreaming and trying to figure out what to say to Ishimaru - and returns home to the apartment. He's not sure if Ishimaru still has work or not.]

[Ishimaru is actually off work when Mondo returns - something that's immediately made plain by the sheer amount of yelling that's going on as soon as Mondo enters the apartment.]

Kyohei!

[...at least the yelling isn't aimed at Mondo.

Regardless, Ishimaru is standing in the living room, hands planted firmly on his hips and looking very annoyed; he's managed to obtain a new Pokémon today - hatched by Kimblee, as Ishimaru cannot hatch things properly to save his life - and it seems he's already done a spectacular job of losing it. Kind of an impressive feat in a four-room apartment, really.

It's difficult being this awesome, okay?

However, after a moment of just standing there and...huffing, pretty much, he releases his Espeon from her Pokéball.]

Sayuri, go find Kyohei and let him know this isn't acceptable -

[...and that's when he seems to notice Mondo. He immediately...well, snaps to attention, really, looking more than slightly embarrassed as he does so; Sayuri just rolls her eyes and skulks off to go find the missing 'mon in question.]

Ah, aniki...! I was just...

[...just...getting very flustered, apparently...]

How was your day?!

So you've picked up a new Pokémon?

[Mondo sounds more amused than anything though.]

No need to yell. My day was okay; same old shit with laundry duty. Maybe eventually they'll have me doing something fucking interesting.

[He's beginning to doubt that, unfortunately...]

So, who's Kyohei? Or rather, what kinda Pokémon is it?

[That seems to be a safer topic of discussion than the one he's been thinking about all day.]

Another psychic-type; Ralts is the name of it, and while the Colonel and Kimblee-san seemed to think we would do well, he doesn't seem to like me very much yet...

[Because clearly, giving one of the most hotblooded trainers in Johto a Pokémon that's extremely sensitive to emotions won't end in huge disaster or anything.]

You're home late, if that's all you were doing, though. Is there anything wrong?

[Mondo nods absently at that. He has no idea what a Ralts is, but it sounds like Ishimaru's having some problems already.]

I'm sure he'll warm up to you! You're a great guy after all!

[Ah, but that question catches him off-guard and Mondo looks momentarily panicked.]

No, there's nothing wrong. I just kept getting distracted, that's all!

[...Right, because that's the best response instead of just telling Ishimaru his feelings like a man. He's so fucking weak.]

[...well, that doesn't look good, does it...]

Distracted by what?

[Shit. The last thing he needs to do is panic. He's got this.]

A lot of fucking stupid thoughts about you, that's what!

[.............he doesn't got this, never mind.]

W-What?!

[LET'S BE REAL HERE, NO ONE'S GOT THIS]

What are you talking about?!

[SHIT FUCK UM...]

Ever since last fucking week I've been trying to figure out why the fuck I like you so fucking much!! This should've been fucking easy! You're supposed to be my aniki!

[It's about then that he realizes he's said something damning and the yelling stops immediately. Mondo doesn't say anything, he just looks like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car. Shit, he didn't mean to let it slip like that! What the hell is Ishimaru going to think about that?]

[Ishimaru just shakes his head a bit at that, clearly confused; he knows that there's something in there that he's supposed to be understanding, especially given the way Mondo has suddenly frozen up, but the harder he tries to comprehend anything that was just said, the less sense it makes.

He folds his arms after a while, looking at Mondo with a bit of a hard expression, clearly trying to regain some control over the situation.]

Come sit down with me; we can discuss this. Fighting over it won't get us anywhere!

[Despite the usual attempt at authority, however, there's a bit of a strange edge to his words. Please stop fighting with him and sit...]

[Normally Mondo would hate being bossed around by anyone, but he's thankful that Ishimaru is taking charge like this and ignoring that stupid slip of the tongue there.]

...yeah, 'course.

[He sits on the couch, oddly rigid for once. He knows Ishimaru is going to ask him what he meant by that, so he decides to head off the question.]

I... Look, you're very important to me. I don't want to lose your friendship despite whatever stupid shit I might say, alright?

[Ishimaru sits down next to him, angled so that he can look at Mondo more directly and keep an eye on his physical reactions a bit better than he usually does. There's still tension in his posture, but he doesn't seem overly worried by what Mondo is saying to him, at least not at this point.]

...I understand, yes. And you're very important to me, too, aniki - like I said, I'm always going to be here for you. Remember?

[For a moment, Mondo considers asking Ishimaru to promise him. That wouldn't be fair and he knows it, but the desire is certainly there. Even if he can never be with Ishimaru, having him as a friend isn't something Mondo wants to lose.]

You remember what happened a week ago, right? How things got kinda weird between us?

[He's been trying to make things as normal as possible, but it's been a bit difficult.]

Well, I realized something that... hadn't occurred to me before and it... shit, I didn't know what to do with it.

[Fuck, he should just be able to say it! He never beats around the bush like this! He's surprised he isn't yelling yet, but he's pretty sure that will change in a few seconds.]

What I'm saying is that I fucked up, alright? I guess I misinterpreted our friendship as something more and... fuck. Fuck.

[He absently rubs the back of his neck, trying to come up with some way to word it. It isn't working.]

I just... You're... really important to me, you know? I don't want to lose that no matter what and...

[...UGH FUCK THIS SHIT HE CAN'T DO IT]

I'm in fucking love with you, bastard!

[Ishimaru doesn't move to interrupt through any of that, though he is giving quite the wide-eyed stare by the time Mondo gets to the point; he...thinks he can see where it's going once he really gets started, but he doesn't believe it until Mondo confirms it, actually confirms it, and for a good moment he isn't sure what to do. There are many reasons for his hesitation, not least of which being the fact that he doesn't know how he feels about this sort of thing himself - but first and foremost, he's never seen Mondo this unsure and openly nervous about something, not quite like this. It troubles him deeply, and he's equally troubled by the fact that he doesn't know what he should do in response, what the proper course of action should be; after a moment, he simply moves on impulse, doing the first thing that comes to mind.

He shifts closer to Mondo on the couch, placing an arm around his shoulders in a manner that practically screams that he has no idea what he's doing, before finally pulling Mondo into what amounts to the most awkward hug on the planet.]

First of all, you aren't losing anything. I don't want to hear you talking to me like that again, all right? I promise you that you aren't losing anything.

[Well, as awkward as that hug might be, it's something Mondo wasn't aware he needed this badly. He moves to wrap his arms around Ishimaru in return. He briefly wonders if this is okay after what he just said, but he can't get himself to let go.

And then Ishimaru's talking and the sense of relief that floods him is so overwhelming he almost tears up.]

Th-thanks. I... thanks.

[The sense of relief is audible, but he can't really say he cares.]

I don't know what I'd do if I lost you.

LOCKED TO ardent

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